Delusions

A Patron with Delusions in Your Library

A five-step strategy

By: Ryan Dowd

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Step 1: The basics:

Do not argue. Do not try to convince a person that the delusions are not real. You will not be successful, but you will escalate the conflict considerably.

Do not agree. Do not treat the delusions as real and "play along" with them. While this may seem like the path of least resistance, you can do damage. Imagine the poor psychologist later when the person explains, "But I know this is true. Go ask the Librarian! She agrees with me!"

Instead, sidestep the delusion. Instead of arguing or agreeing, sidestep the delusions. If the delusion isn't disruptive to the library, then just ignore it. There are plenty of people who hold weird beliefs (and many have been elected to public office). If the person's delusion is disruptive to the library, than focus on the disruptive behavior rather than the delusion. The trick is to politely return the conversation back to the behavior.

Step 2: Get your mindset correct:

You are not in danger. Hollywood has taught us that individuals suffering with mental illness are dangerous. This is rarely true. The vast majority of people with delusions are not violent. I have known hundreds of delusional individuals who would never harm anyone.

Slow down. It can be uncomfortable to talk to someone with delusions. That discomfort may make you rush the person. This is not helpful. Slow down. Let the person explain their reality rather than cutting them off. Take an extra 2 minutes now and you will save yourself 20 minutes later.

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Step 3: Get your body language (and positioning) correct:

Walk, don't run. If you are called over to a problem situation, make sure you are walking when you get there. When you run up on a patron (or walk quickly) it is viewed as aggressive, which creates anxiety (and counter-aggressiveness).

Take the conversation somewhere less public. It is easier to have a conversation with a delusional patron without an audience. They will be calmer (and so will you) if you move the conversation 15 feet away so that other people are not listening in.

Step 4: Initiate the conversation respectfully to get the person's “emotional inertia” going in the right direction):

Smile: Approach with a smile. A smile sends the message that you want to work "with" the person instead of working "against" him/her. This tiny act makes it more likely that the patron will work with you.

Use names. Introduce yourself (with your first name) and ask the person’s name. Then use it. It is very respectful and will humanize you.

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Step 5: Use the right words (examples of specific phrases that work):

The trick is to neither affirm nor deny the delusion and then move on to the behavior that you would like to change

"Even if that is true..."

"I suppose that might be the case, but either way..."

"I'm not sure about that, but either way..."

An (overly simplified) example of this language in practice:

You: Sir, I would be happy to reshelve those books for you. The Joel Olsteen books don’t belong in the cooking section.

Patron: I don’t want the Russians to find them.

You: What?

Patron: The communist spies that have infiltrated our country hide their secret messages in Joel Olsteen books. We have to keep them from communicating. That is why I am hiding them all over the library.

You: I'm not sure about that, but either way our Board of Directors insists that ALL books be put in the right section. If books are in the wrong place, I get in trouble.

Patron: What about the communist spies?

You: I’m happy to keep an eye out for any unusual activity around the Joel Olsteen books, but I don’t want to lose my job because all the books are in the wrong place.

Patron: Ok, but you will keep an eye out for Russians?

You: Thank you, sir. I will keep an eye on the Joel Olsteen books.

Thank you for your service to the community!

Peace,

Ryan Dowd

Homeless shelter Executive Director and author of The Librarian's Guide to Homelessness (from the ALA)

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